... i wish that i had somthing fun to write about today but im just having a tough day and i guess im hoping writing it all down will help me feel a little bit better . I wish i knew when it would get easier without my grandfather ..i truely do but it seems like as the days go on it only gets harder. I miss him so very much we all do , he truely was an amazing man and i only hope that someday i can be half of the person that he was to all of us . I know that god needed him more than we did and i know that it was time , he fought such a hard battle and he did it with a smile most of the time . Never once did he complain he always had somthing positive to say about it all i just have to wounder why is it the people that do so much good that suffer the most . I am thankful that i have had 27 amazing years with my grandfather and i truly did have lots of time with him i spent more time with him and my grandmother than i did at my own house and when i look back i wouldnt change it for a second. Its funny in 27 years not once do i ever remember being upset with him for anything he always had nothing but support , laughter and lots of m and ms for all of us . Walking into my grandmothers house is so hard i hate not hearing him yell for the kids as soon as he saw us open the door, i would give anything in the entire world for just one more day , one more smile , one more joke anything . I hate that i cant get over this and i hate that it gets worse everyday. I know that i will get through it , ill never get over it and ill never forget it but ill get through it and i know that hes with me .. alot i can feel it and i see the signs everywhere so i talk to him alot ..all the time whenever somthing is bothering me .. i talk to him and it seems to bring me peace .. and ill be waiting to see him again when its my turn to go to the other side , ive still got quite a bit to do hear on earth , my 2 kids need me more than ever , alex needs me and my grandmother needs us all so much . so until we meet again papa know that you are never far from my mind ... and we all think about you all the time .. here i go again crying as i write this .. it will stop sometime right ?
May you always walk in sunshine and gods love around you flow ,for the happiness you have us , no one will ever know. It broke our hearts to lose you but you did not go alone a part of us went with you the day god called you home . A million times we've needed you a million times we've cried. If love could have only saved you , you never would have died.
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